This game is a little
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sick, a little funny, and a little weird all rolled into one. Before I begin the review, I would ask that you commune with your personal deity of preference, to insure your soul is not damned to eternity. If the cover art doesn’t invoke imagery of a psychiatrists office a few years down the line, I don’t know what will.
“How Do You Do It?”, is a game of interesting proportions, wherein the player takes the role of a nameless 11 year old girl on her high flying adventure. I can hear you saying to me, “Well Ingredients, everyone loves little girls in video
games, just look at Clementine from the walking dead series, or Ellie from the last of us.” In response, I would throw a thumbs up at
nodding my head profusely in agreement, protecting them is such second nature
to us gamers, so much so that America must have secretly withdrawn into a lolita complex we can’t identify.
In the midst of America reclining within the depths of said lolita complex, this little gem has arisen, and come to my attention. Girl A, as she will be referred to for the rest of this investigation, is left at home alone by her mother, who is going out of the house for an indeterminate amount of time. When Mother A leaves, Girl A proceeds to immediately rush to her set of dolls, and figure out just what mommy
and the man from last night
Of course, *scoffs* it’s up to you and I to help this precious young flower of youth figure out the depravities of sin and intercourse, by repeatedly slamming two plastic dolls together until she blushes like she finally understands everything one can know.
While, you should understand wailing naked puppets together is only one of your concerns, the other being on constant guard of mother coming home, lest she should catch you unawares, and shame you.
My favorite part of the game by far is its quaint unadulterated ending. Wondering how many euphoric eunuch clicks you produced during your time manifested as a young girl?
Yeah…you know you wanted to ask.
So kiddos, remember to
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I love you lots,
P.S. – I apologize
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